In a way, anyone who experienced being in a relationship has at least a remote understanding that there is some compatibility that unfolds over time. The sad statistics of official divorces, it is expressed by the famous formula – “characters did not match.” Therefore, as a rule, when couples seek astrological consultation at the initial stage of a relationship, they have much more chances to consider the prospect of a partnership somewhat from a distance, to give themselves more time and space for gradual development of a relationship and exploration of the “character” – both of one’s own and the character of a potential partner.
This approach allows not only save time and nerve cells, but also to avoid serious disappointments, as well as a period of sometimes long rehabilitation after another failed relationship. The older the age of the partners, the more this approach is in demand – often both partners have several unsuccessful marriages behind them, and the hope of finding a partner “for the soul”, the soul mate, becomes more tangible, on the one hand, and more vulnerable, on the other. Because the experience of accumulated dramas and traumas strengthens fear and anxiety about one’s own ability to succeed in a new relationship. The more each new relationship resembles the previous ones, the more clearly a certain scenario is traced in them – the more is the fear of a new failure that undermines trust in others, in oneself, and in the partnership in general. In such a situation, the compatibility analysis gives us important guidelines, sensible support and a solid ground in the search for a happy partnership.
Is love possible without compatibility? And compatibility without love?
Both love and relationships are quite possible without high compatibility, the only question is what will be the quality, duration, fruits and consequences of these relationships. At the very beginning of a relationship, we experience an intense feeling of falling in love, which is based on projections about the partner, and this projective psychic material accompanies every process of falling in love. Projections are not just an expectation of certain manifestations, but a somewhat false interpretation of the partner’s real manifestations, which fuels the feeling of love and gives a special status to the partner we choose. This is the search for compatibility, the search for togetherness and at the same time the idealization of a partner, which is necessary for the stage of falling in love, and which becomes the cause of further difficulties of de-idealization. That is why, when we are captivated by the condition of falling in love, we not only tend to ignore certain manifestations of a partner that go beyond our projections, but are even deprived of the possibility of such a vision. Thus, the astrological compatibility analysis system is a great tool to help us fall in love with potentially highly compatible partners. And then there are very high chances that infatuation will grow into a long and happy love, despite the recurring scenarios that can and probably will accompany the transformation of infatuation into love.
Is there 100% compatibility?
In general, any partnership is a situation for self-discovery and personal growth, and one hundred percent compatibility, from an astrological point of view, does not exist. Yes, probably, it will disappoint many, but still, the minimum 20 or the maximum possible 80 percent are two very different pictures of a partnership, because in a relationship with low compatibility there will be not enough resources to support the partners in overcoming acute moments of de-idealization and building the common future. It can be said with certainty that there will be tense moments in any relationship, the only question is their quantity and the degree of tension.
When it is said that people live “soul to soul” – this does not mean at all that these are two identical personalities who share the same outlook and interests, who hold hands around the clock, without leaving the ecstasy of the stage of identification and merging with each other. High compatibility is a dance of different identities, a harmony of complementarity, and a pleasant resonance of sameness and differences, which takes place in various spheres of the couple’s life.
If we analyze the statistics of inquiries, which are more than 500 couples over 10 years, people of different ages and social status, living in different cities and countries, it can be noted that almost 99% of couples who complain about deep and chronic difficulties in partnership have relatively low compatibility – about 50%. Under such circumstances, their relationship can last for years, because there is still a certain potential for compatibility in such a marriage. Very often, the crisis comes with the birth of children – when the family system changes, the couple simply does not have enough resources to withstand these changes caused by growth and development. The tension increases and over time becomes unbearable, since the resource in such a marriage is far from being redundant, and in the moments of a crisis it simply runs out.
Not many couples with high compatibility (60-80%) are seeking advice because they simply do not have a serious need for consultations on this matter. Such relationships are strong and last for years.
There are very few couples with compatibility of less than 40-50 percent – on an intuitive, unconscious level, most of us have a strong feeling of such low compatibility, and this kind of a person simply will not arouse interest and admiration. Couples with very low compatibility are formed on the background of either low sensitivity to oneself and the reality of one’s own feelings, or during some dramatic events, when it is quite difficult to track and understand one’s own feelings. Sometimes both of these factors are present, as they are interrelated.
What are the compatibility indicators?
Based on the date, place, and time of birth, we analyze 12 main factors of compatibility – these are mental compatibility, psycho-physical, sexual, compatibility of values, temperamental compatibility, factors of support and energy in a couple, the ability to understand each other, the potential for prosperity and birth of children, as well as karmic indicators of difficulties and troubles. Such a comprehensive analysis allows us to see not only the general picture in percentages but also to determine the development zones in detail – to track in which areas there are manifestations of disharmony and tension and the need to practice patience, to treat your partner more sensitively and thoughtfully, understanding and appreciating his/ her nature and his/ her uniqueness.
Is physical compatibility important in a marriage?
There are certain compatibility factors that are quite difficult to harmonize – for example, they include psycho-physical constitution or temperament, sexual compatibility and the potential to understand each other. These are “innate”, basic personality settings, experience and awareness which can be obtained only in a couple, through contact with the Other. These indicators are the most important, because they appear from the depths of the unconscious, where it is difficult for the gaze of reflection to penetrate. That which concerns corporeality is the unconscious in its purest form. These three indicators have the greatest specific weight in the astrological system of compatibility. High compatibility according to these factors creates a feeling of unity and resourcefulness in the couple. If compatibility according to these factors is weak, a certain distance will be built up in the couple over time, which will protect partners from experiencing such disharmonious manifestations.
This is an unconscious positive scenario, but in the long run it leads to painful alienation, because the need for closeness will be unsatisfied, and then a certain moment comes that brings the understanding that this relationship has run out because it happened that we suddenly “became strangers.”
What contributes to compatibility?
The study of the strengths and resources of compatibility creates substantial support for the exploration and for the harmonization of development zones. The main methodological basis in this process is the understanding that we are different, but we are good together. Permission to be ourselves, which we consciously give to ourselves and to our partner. Acceptance of one’s own deep internal truth and as a result – awareness of these features as one’s own uniqueness and value, as well as the uniqueness and value of a partner. This requires maturity and experience of self-discovery from partners, because only in this process can we touch our own nature, and gain knowledge about ourselves and our partner. Compatibility is a mutual reinforcement that makes the couple and each of us stronger, more fulfilled, and happier.
